Gods Plan Not Mine

So the past couple of days have been pretty tough, all because of what I have planned for this weekend. Hubby and I are headed to Buffalo (ugh) for my FIL's retirement party. Usually when I go to the IL's I have a hard time because it's as though my hubby turns into a completely different person. They are very conservative baptists, and it seems that they tend to do things separate as male and female groups rather then together. So often times when we head upstate I don't even get to see my hubby much, which is so not the way things are at home (or how I was raised for that matter). Now add to this the fact that my SIL is pregnant and due 6 days after we were!! I love this SIL so very much and she is preggo after having triplets via IVF after having tried for 3 years!!! So this is a miracle baby in all reality. And if she were just one month before or after our due date, although it would still be hard, it would make me feel so much better. The thing is I know this sounds so infantile, yet I can't seem to make the fear of seeing her pregnant belly and hearing everyone talk about it not eat me up inside....AND I'M NOT EVEN THERE YET!!! The last thing I want to do is make my SIL feel bad. And it's not really her I'm worried about as she has been through so much pain of her own and knows how I am feeling. It's everyone who has no idea who will be talking about it with excitement and God forbid asking hubby and I when we will start having kids!!! And as I mentioned, I will be with all women most of the time so you know it's going to happen. Usually my hubby is the only person (besides God) who can make me feel better, so he promised to try harder to spend more time with me.

So I was wondering if you ladies would mind praying for me this weekend? I want so badly to be able to focus on this little miracle and not be selfish and think only of myself. Please pray that the Lord gives me peace and compassion so that I can enjoy my time with family and not hurt my SIL's feelings.