Gods Plan Not Mine

So here I am in another two week wait.  Even though it has been 4 months since we lost Poppy, sometimes I just still can't believe I'm back here again.  In the past week, two women who I adore have informed me of their 2nd losses.  One dear friend did IVF both times only to lose both babies before 6 weeks.  When these women come to me & I am able to help them because I have been open & up front about my losses (despite some people not being comfortable with this), I am reaffirmed that my angel babies were not for nothing.  They have given me the ability to comfort these women & give them hope.  One of them have said how she feels bad for her husband because if he had married someone else, then their babies would be alive.  I don't know about you, but boy did I ever deal with this guilt.  Or the feeling that they are too scared to try again or they may never become a mom.  I know I didn't believe people when they told me it would happen for me, but did I ever hold on to that hope & appreciate their optimism.  Because of my losses, I can be that person to these ladies & I am grateful they have felt comfortable enough to come to me.  I do ask that you  please keep Jen & Kate in your prayers.  They are both such lovely women & will make amazing parents.

I am now 2dpiui & dealing w/some slight OHSS.  After my previous IUI's, I have dealt w/some cramping but never like this.  I ended up w/3 mature follicles all in my right ovary & that is definitely the side that is hurting.  Because the follicles were so big by CD 12 (24mm, 17mm & 16mm) they had me trigger that night & had the IUI done on CD13.  Hubby was a rock star as well, so I am really hoping this is our month.  I start progesterone & lovenox tomorrow & can't express to you just how much I HATE needles.  After hearing from Tracy & doing some research, I have decided to go ahead w/the HCG injections once we get a positive as well.  I also went in on CD11 & did the intralipid IV treatment.  I am definitely over being poked & prodded after this week!  Let's hope all this craziness helps us get & STAY pregnant.  "Only" 12 more days to go (that is if I can hold out POS prior to that).